1 week down. 51 more to go.

This time last week I woke up knowing it would be the last day I saw my husband for a very long time. A week has now gone by...only a week...really? It feels like time is going so slow, but on the other hand it feels like just yesterday he was holding me in his arms kissing me saying, "be strong baby, I'm going to miss you so much, I love you. see you soon."

I have been doing pretty well I think, staying strong and hanging in there, but I just miss my husband so much and today I just feel like being lazy. I woke up so many times last night. The feeling I get when I wake up in the middle of the night and realize he isn't asleep next to me isn't a good feeling. It makes me miss him so much. And I get scared. You may think I'm being dramatic but just having that feeling and then knowing I am going to feel it everyday for 12 months is a lot to bare. It's not like he is going to be away for a long time in a business trip, it's that he is going to be away for a long time in the worst place that anyone could be right now.It's just me in the house today. My sister left for vacation and my Mom is going to visit my Grammy in the hospital. So, me, Grayson and Karat are hanging out and I am hoping I get to hear from Zak today. Really hoping. Even a quick hello online, e/mail or short phone call would suffice. I just want to talk to my husband today.

The love Zak and I have knows no boundaries and there is no such thing as a distance too far or an obstacle to complex. We have always had such a strong and unique bond. The saying, "he is my other half" truly applies here. It has always felt as if we could read each others minds, finish sentences..we have always been able to feel what the other is feeling before we even have spoken. And I still feel that. Half a world away and I still feel him.Even though I do not know what he is doing I feel like I am feel him thinking about me.... The love Zak and I have knows no boundaries and there is no such thing as a distance too far or an obstacle to complex.

So bring it on deployment...you've got nothing on us.


"to the monster star and back"